I’m devastated, that although I’m back in a place I consider my roots, I feel as if I have just been uprooted. I want so much to blame someone, something, some stupid unfortunate event to which I can channel my anger and disappointment. But the more I dwell, the more I realize that this was all my doing, whether or not I realized it at the time. Maybe I should’ve tried harder, planned better, been smarter.

I thought I made it. I thought that I had left this place for good.

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